Golden Age

Right.  You might have noticed a dearth of posts.  Here that is.  I’m sure there are other fine establishments you frequent with blogs that are, well, themselves frequent and frequented.

Not mine.  Not mine so much recently.

I blame television.  Mostly because I avoid blaming myself whenever possible.  It helps my self esteem.  Not that it needs much help.  I am pretty awesome.  Oh, I’m going to segue into a story that shows off my awesomeness.

We took a course at work the other week.  19 of us, but the important folks are me and 4 dudes on my team.  The instructor wanted to motivate us.  He said, “I’ve taught 1400 dudes, duders, el duderinos and assorted others (I’ve taken liberties with the dialogue.  Blame the Coehns.)  To each class I offer a bottle of champagne to all those who score perfectly.”

The instructor did this to motivate us.  One of the class who didn’t know me that well professed that I was sure to be one of those who won said bottle.  This despite the fact that the instructor also said he’d only ever given out 3.  I knew that my awesomeness had limits.  Caring enough to invest the effort to get 100% is beyond them.  Heck, I think there is even a good chance I’m not bright enough to get the score.  Maybe – but I do have a high opinion of myself.

Competition does motivate me though, but I thought 100% was unobtainable.  So I made a follow up bet with my team.  I’d pay them a case of beer each if they simply beat my score on the exam.  I indicated that the bet was to motivate them, but, just between us, it was mostly to motivate myself.  I hate losing.

How does this story demonstrate my awesomeness.  Well, I thought it would show my benevolence and my leadership skills.  But admitting I made the bet to selfish reasons basically tromps over those goals.  Darn.  OK.  Well at the end of the story I get the highest score and kick the butts of my team.  So – at least I’m good at taking exams even if I fail at leadership and humility. But y’all knew that already.

The story has a happy ending.  Although it wasn’t part of the bet one of my staff felt that the bet was only fair if he wagered a case of beer too.  So I won a case of beer.  It was delicious.

OK – back to the vacancy of my blog and television.  A good writer would segue back to that subject smoothly and show how the previous anecdote related to the main thesis.  But such a writer might not have deserted their blog in the first place.  You are stuck with me.

Or you would be, but I think I’m done for the day.  I’m feeling a bit hungry.  Therefore, I’m going to desert the blog once again and get some food.  I’ll explain about the television another time.

Maybe.  It is a bit of a cliffhanger ending to get you to come back.  But, spoilers, the television story has a lousy unresolved ending too.  Or it might if I ever write it.

Talk to you soon.