Winter – the pros and cons

Winter has been on my mind lately.  Lurking like a serial killer in an urban legend.  Perhaps though I am being too hard on the season.  To weigh it carefully I have compiled this list of pros and cons.

Pros:

  1. That first brisk breath of air that frosts up your lungs
  2. The look of frost on a clear morning coating the trees
  3. The cheery glow of a fireplace warming the home
  4. A cup of warm beverage warming the fingers and gullet
  5. The spooky play of steam rising from the storm sewers
  6. The dynamic play of ice fog across the streets on a cold, cold night
  7. Christmas

7 things.  More than I anticipated.  I think there might be only four things I dislike:

  1. The cold
  2. The snow
  3. The ice
  4. The unending darkness

But I beleive I can coax out more specifics:

  1. Every freezing breath after the first out in the cold
  2. Runny noses
  3. Eyes watering from the wind
  4. Glasses fogging up coming in from the cold
  5. Stupid winter drivers
  6. Treacherous roads threatening even the cautious
  7. Getting frost bit fingers touching a vehicle for even a moment
  8. Attempting to extricate myself from my car without sure footing
  9. Worrying about walking across the ice
  10. Attempting to walk across the ice
  11. Shoving my walker through snow – it hates snow – odd in that it doesn’t have many other anthropomorphic properties
  12. Falling on the ice
  13. Dying while lying n the ground slowly freeing to death
  14. Wearing heavy clothes and bundling up
  15. Losing dexterity in the fingers due to either the cold or the mittens
  16. Getting up in the dark
  17. Going to bed in the dark
  18. Going to work in the dark
  19. Going home from work in the dark

Analyzing the list I think I can come to the conclusion that winter is best enjoyed from inside while watching it out of the window.  I think it is a pretty objective study.

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12 thoughts on “Winter – the pros and cons

  1. David Silvestri says:

    As much as I love having you in Edmonton… I gotta say I’m a bit surprised you’ve never considered actually moving to a warmer climate.

    Your points are valid, especially as they relate to you.

    I have to say some are not that bad really. If the asthmatic can deal with the cold breath certainly you can too.

    😀

  2. Brandi says:

    Try 6 months of grey skies and never ending rain, or having to deal with city drivers attempting to drive with the little skiff of snow when it does actually fall. I miss real winter believe it or not (including all your cons)!

  3. @Dave To get warm enough to ensure a lack of real winter, I’d likely have to endure drug cartel wars and/or hurricanes. Edmonton has lots to recommend it including winters that are fairly mild on average.

    Plus I mostly just like to complain!

    @Bran – You could move back. You and Dave are welcome in the city anytime.

  4. Mythi says:

    In my awkward elementary school years, the cold weather gave me an excuse to wear pants without looking out of place. I always wore pants, even in 25+ degree weather.

    CP and I tend to overheat quickly, so bring on the cold!

    We share a mutual dislike of ice, though. I wear gloves when walking outside in winter, not so much that it’s cold, but to reduce the amount of scrapes I’d get on my hands if I slipped and fell.

  5. craig says:

    Being of Central/Eastern European descent and sufficiently self insulated I love winter, always have. There is a stillness to the season.

    Sue on the other hand feels winter is a personal affront and would rather hibernate through it.

  6. I’m pretty thrilled here. This is the most comments I’ve gotten in weeks! Yay!

    @Mythi – I needed that excuse to wear pants too. Many awkward moments of showing up at elementary in just my underwear. 🙂

    @Craig – I’m not sure that my opinion is objective or not, but I think there is a good chance that you are just wrong and Suellen is right. I think that it could actually make a good horror story – Winter stalks a young woman – personally looking to ruin her life. Glaciers around her would start growing by a couple centimeters a year instead of retreating. Snow would pile up blocking her door forcing her to climb out the window to escape the house. Black Ice forming at the base of the driveway causing her to either slide into traffic leaving the house or slide into the porch coming home.

    • Mythi says:

      Ha! With the popularity of baggy pants and low-rise jeans, showing off one’s underwear seems to the current trend among young’uns.

      I once spied a young male walking towards U of A one chilly morning, with a giant hole in the back of his pants. It was as if someone had ripped off the back pocket. I and anyone else who passed him saw his boxers *through* his pants. I wondered if this was an intentional fashion choice, because it was way too cold that day not to notice that one butt cheek was more sensitive to the breeze than the other.

      I like your story so far. If you won’t write it, maybe Stephen King would pick it up. Or M. Night: what a twist! 😛

      • There is no happy ending to the story. Things would slowly escalate. Our heroine would begin to feel drafts in the house at all times. She’d wear thermal underwear, flannel pyjamas, socks and a nightcap to bed and sleep under a heavy blanket pus a down comforter. She’d begin to fear even her own fridge and freezer as even new products would become frostburnt within.

        If she tried to leave town there would be a winter blizzard shutting down the airport and the roads. Likely there would be a physical consequence – a disfigurement due to a frostbitten nose or ear.

        The final straw would be something mundane. She’d sit down on the toilet. The seat cold – everything is always cold now. A weird sound would arise and she’d realize that she was peeing onto a layer of ice coating the water in the bowl.

  7. Suellen says:

    y God, I’m almost there. I just lack the night cap. There would be the finality of things freezing while being expelled. The shock would make thing shrivel.

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